Let's just say 2020 has gotten off to a pretty good start! Minus recent dental work (my 2nd root canal in less than a year - lucky me), I've had quite a few things to smile about. A renewed interest in blogging is one, followed by the possibilities of finally setting up a home office in the very near future (more on that in a later blog). But absolutely NOTHING has made me happier than spotting the return of Arby's fish sandwiches!
As I was driving home the other day, something took over me while passing an Arby's restaurant. Plastered in big, bold lettering across their drive-thru menu was a fish ad. Was I seeing things? Could it be?! YES!
Seemingly losing all control, like a madman in need of a fix, I promptly busted a U-Turn, tires screeching, entering the drive-thru...
Drive-thru voice: *Singing an Arby's Fish Sandwich Jingle*
Welcome to Arby's, can I take your order?
Me: Good Evening, can I please have two crispy fish sandwiches?
Drive-thru voice: I'm sorry, Sir, can you repeat that?
Me: Yes, two crispy fish sandwiches, that's all...
Drive-thru voice: *Inaudible sound*
Me: *Losing patience*
Drive-thru voice: I'm sorry, Sir, can you repeat that once more?
Me: *Sigh*... TWO CRISPY CHICKEN SANDWICHES, MAN!
Drive-thru voice: Two crispy chickens? Is that all?
Let's just say that exchange didn't go all too well, but I didn't allow my lack of patience to get the best of me. I left Arby's in total bliss - two crispy FISH sandwiches in tow and they were ALL MINE!
I would love an explanation as to why certain fast food chains only provide their most favorable sandwiches seasonally (cut that shit out!). I mean, is there some type of "fish shortage" from spring to December preventing Arby's from possibly depleting my bank account? Is there some type of "beef shortage" putting a stop to Mc Donald's selling their infamous McRib sandwich year round? (the McRib sounds gross, but plenty of people vouch for it). Can you imagine if Burger King experienced a "burger shortage?" Popeye's/KFC dealing with a "chicken shortage?" The whole world would go mad! But when Arby's fish sandwiches go M.I.A., not a single word. Somebody get Ving Rhames on the phone!
Okay, I'm done here.
Giving 2019 a Swift Kick in the A**
My apologies for leaving you all high & dry. I'll try to do better.
On a personal note, 2019 goes down as one of THE WORST years to date. There was the passing of my grandmother - which I don't think I'll ever truly get over - coupled with a few life changing events, but in hindsight, there were PLENTY of life lessons which I fully intend to carry forth into 2020 and beyond. Because as we all know, everything happens for a reason.
I am back in my happy place, meaning more content (check out my new YouTube page), more blogs (even if the current population HATES to read), and in due time, my 2nd book. I am not much of a 'Resolutions' guy; admittedly, I set goals DAILY, but I am truly optimistic that 2020 will be a joyous ride. Here's hoping you experience the same 🥂
Architecture Gone Wrong
WHAT IS THIS?! Better yet, WHY would anyone spend over $2000 a month to live in this excuse of a apartment building (strangely resembling a penitentiary) found on the Upper West Side of Manhattan?
NYC has done it again, overpricing tenants with this semi-new high-rise (built only a couple of years ago), selling them on yet another luxury apartment. One that offers close proximity to famous landmarks, spectacular views and the feeling of exclusivity.
Nevermind the nearby fire station with fire trucks regularly blaring sirens in the wee hours of the morning, the lack of a washer/dryer in each unit, a decent neighboring pizza shop, a friggin' supermarket or the limitations on street parking. No. That's unimportant to today's pool of young tenants whose only objective is to experience NYC and all its luxury. P.S.199, my old elementary school, is a few blocks away from this eye sore - still hanging on by a thread - surrounded by towering buildings (some newly built) since my carefree days of crushing homeruns in the school yard. I can remember a time when crafty-imaginative adults and senior citizens roamed and I proudly called this neighborhood home. More important? Everything was within reach. In fact, there were TWO pizza shops found within the same radius! How about that? Now, it's flooded with more out-of-towners, ugly buildings, cranes, scaffolding and a massive Apple store that is seemingly out of place. Perhaps it's me who doesn't belong - and that's why I said hello to Suburbia almost 15 years ago 🖕🏾🖕🏾
Ella Fitzgerald Would Be Proud... I Think
'Blue Skies,' was a feel good tune performed by Ella Fitzgerald (click on her name to listen), but I DON'T think she had this in mind. The proximity of the planes caught me off guard, so I snapped away. Minutes later, there were more trails in the sky (all gathered around the sun) and before long, an overcast.
I took some more pics, but didn't find them as blatant as the ones above. In the words of Elmer Fudd- "There's something awfully screwy going on around here..."
Probably The Most Eventfully Boring Month On The Calendar
It all started with Black History Month, the Superbowl and Groundhog's Day (ugh!), followed by my birthday where I experienced a nagging toothache (lasting through the month) and finally, pitchers & catchers reporting to Spring Training. But here comes the caveat. There's the incredibly lame Grammy Awards (sadly, the Oscars are in a few days), the joke of a day called Valentine's Day, the dreadful NBA All-Star Game, and the Jussie Smollett fiasco (what an absolute mess that case has turned into). To top it off, February is the month I found out they're re-making a childhood favorite movie: Child's Play. For the love of God, NO! That was the straw that broke the camel's back; I'm absolutely DONE with Hollywood!
Can you imagine if February had 31 days?! The world would go mad!
I'm baaaack! Back to writing about the things many of you THINK about, yet carefully store in a safe place. Not me. I promise to be more active on this blog... as soon as Bryce Harper signs with an effin' team. My predictions so far have been on the money just a tad bit. Machado did in fact sign with a National League team (as I predicted), signing with the San Diego Padres for 10 years/300 Million (so I guess my dreams of seeing Harper in a Padres uniform are out of the question, unless, the Padres are willing to sign TWO players for 300 mil... not inconceivable, just plain 'ol dumb). My Spidey senses continue to tell me he'll sign with an out-of-the-blue team. All signs continue to point to the Philadelphia Phillies, but I say no. I'm going out on a limb with this, but Harper signs with the... *drumroll*
Anyway, enough baseball talk for now - they'll be plenty of time for that (yes, I am gearing up for yet another fantasy baseball season *rubbing hands*). Stay tuned for more nonsense. I'll be posting an Academy Awards themed blog shortly. March couldn't get here any sooner.
Food For Thought
Look at that good 'ol burger! I don't know about you, but I am salivating at the mouth. All that is missing is an order of fries (not to mention a licensed Physician and an irate PETA member). We live in a society where health and fitness have become king. The world of fatty foods and gluten products have gone the way of the dinosaurs... but not so fast! There are plenty of us who still enjoy a good burger. Here is a list of 5 foods that have me by the b@!!%...
Will Robo Calls End?!
Its become an epidemic - robot calls. Enough is enough; you've forced my hand. I am willing to turn my cell phone off for the duration of the day just so that you all become acquainted to my automated voicemail greeting. Did you honestly think you could fool me (us) disguising your numbers with 'local area codes?' Do you think I was born yesterday?! Fools.
Maybe our Government will crack down on this, just like they've elected to crack down on (fill in the blank). Then again, maybe not. But you guys will continue to get rejected as long as I own a cellular device - which won't be long.
Good luck guys.
Speaking of 'good luck', it amazes me how valued you become when your credit ranking is through the roof. It's like I'm 18 again. Each day, I'm the recipient of a new offer from some major card company, showcasing awesome rewards points and everything in between. This, from the SAME companies who once upon a time didn't quite value my sound track record of consistent payments (before I'd experience a few financial set backs), as they scurried to tell Collections on me (where I was "punished" for many years). Umm, just an FYI: I'm the SAME effin guy! Don't give me a second chance now, I've done perfectly fine without you...
Credit cards are okay, but having leverage is better (perhaps, you can use that as a slogan). You're very welcome.
A Painful Goodbye to Summer
As we near the end of August, a tear falls from my eye as I think about the beach days dwindling down, hurricanes with ridiculous names (like, Eartha) brewing along the coasts, the leaves drying up, eventually falling to the ground, and the thermometer dropping to cruel and unfair temperatures.
I bid farewell to my fantasy baseball season and the atrocity of my fantasy team. Thank you for under performing all season long and causing me restless days and sleepless nights. I promise to draft less "all-star caliber players" next season. And lastly, goodbye to my baby, a.k.a. my book, Can I Be Ernest? which was officially introduced to the world on 8/28. My little pride & joy is off on his own, entering the homes of complete strangers where he must adapt to other human beings. I coddled him for as long as I could, but as with most parents, you tend to get sick of your child living with you after a while. Time to move out, bud...
Autumn will be here in due time, but for now, I am hoping to get one last beach day - as we prepare for football, the smell of fire wood and hoodie weather. Adios!
Kicking These People & Trends to the Curb
I've given the following post some intense thought, because after all, my brain only tends to rest when I'm asleep (and if you've been paying attention thus far, that isn't much). I've constructed a list of 5 things that need to vanish QUICKLY. Not only for the remaining months of 2018, but beyond! This list includes: people, trends, or anything else which drives me up the wall! Get ready to agree, disagree, ball your fist in anger, or above all, laugh!
(5) Kim Kardashian - Hate to see you go... LOVE to see you leave *wink* But enough is enough. She has the fame, resources, riches, children, she's even stepped foot in the White House! What else is there left to accomplish?
(4) Beyonce - I was on the verge of graduating high school when Destiny's Child debuted - now, I'm old with a few grays and she's still dominating the charts?!
(3) Fauxhawk/Mohawk - If I catch another dude walking around with this dated hairstyle. Even the f*ckin' mullet had an expiration date!
(2) Reality Television - Curse the Writers Guild of America strike of 2007, which was the official downfall of American television. Viewers saw less original content and an influx of non-actors who not only received 15-minutes of fame, but lucrative book deals, TV spin-offs, and above all... celebrity status. Oh, and lest we forget, Flavor Flav, who had the opportunity to mingle with beautiful women who were simply looking for a pay day. As Don King would say, "Only in America!" *facepalm*
(1) The 2000s (including the 2010s) - Okay, so yes, it brought us YouTube, social media, smart phones, the Kardashians, "mumble rap" (I'll never forgive the 2000s for this!), a black man in the White House, and a gang of highs & lows, but what it DIDN'T bring? TIME MACHINES and FLYING CARS! Two items, of which I was promised as a child (by teachers), would be invented by the year 2000. Lies!
21st Century's Finest
3) DVR - The DVR originally burst onto the scene in 1999 (many of you may remember it as TiVo), but it didn't truly take off until the 2000s. VHS tapes were disappearing before our very eyes and no longer would big, boxy VCR's saturate our living rooms. The DVR slowly became the sales pitch for cable companies and I was completely sold once being informed I could pause live TV (say what?!) making those quick pit stops to the restroom more enjoyable!
2) YouTube - The only form of social media I've ever truly appreciated; I don't know where I'd be without it. Whenever a feeling of nostalgia smacks me in the face, I usually extent my hand to YouTube, where I am allowed to escape to a world I USED to love. Aside from that, YouTube has given content creators (and those who are attention-deprived) a platform to showcase their 'talents.' The creme de la creme? no longer do we have to visit the local library to learn how to fix a car tire! Many of our answers are solved thanks to this giant media tool.
1) iPod - I don't care what anyone says, when the iPod burst onto the scene it captured our hearts. This tiny gadget stored thousands of songs, fit into our pockets, and more important - it didn't 'skip', nor did any tape unravel!